5.4.II. Self-Custody Begins With the Practice of the Presence of God

O Holy Trinity, if I am in the state of Grace, and I hope I am, then You are dwelling in my heart, with all Your glory and all Your infinite perfections, just as You dwell in Heaven; but here You are hidden by the veils of Faith.

There is not a single moment when Your eyes are not upon me, seeing all that I do.

Your Justice and Your Mercy are always at work in me. In response to my infidelities, You take away Your special graces, or else You no longer dispose events with maternal care in such a way that they turn out to my advantage: at other times, to bring me back to Yourself, You load me down with fresh kindness.

If I really looked upon this indwelling in me as the most wonderful of all facts and the most worthy of my attention, would I be so often and for such long periods oblivious of it?

Is it not this failure to attend to the fundamental fact of my existence that is the reason for such poor success up to the present in all my attempts to practice self-custody?

A constant succession of ejaculatory prayers all through the day ought to be keeping this loving indwelling of God ever in my conscious thoughts. Up until now, my soul, have you really taken the trouble to fill your life with these little landmarks as you go along; have you even remembered to make these aspirations ONCE IN AN HOUR? Have you drawn enough profit from your daily meditation and from your liturgical life to enter from time to time, even if it is only a few seconds, into the inner sanctuary of your heart, there to adore the infinite Beauty, the Immensity, the All-Power, the Sanctity, the Life, and the Love, in a word, the Supreme and Perfect Good Who deigns to dwell there and Who is your Beginning and your End?

How about Spiritual Communions? What kind of a part do they play in my daily life? And yet they are right at hand, not only to remind me of the indwelling of the Most Holy Trinity within me, but also to increase that indwelling by a new in pouring of the Precious Blood into my soul.

Up to now, how much importance have I attached to these riches that I find all along my road? All I needed to do was bend down and pick up diamonds and place them in my diadem. What a far call it is from me to those souls who, in the thick of their work or their conversations return a thousand times a day to their Divine Guest! They have acquired this habit, and their hearts are fixed where their treasure is.